A SHORT (s) STORY!

  Our planned trip to Hawaii is just about
a month away now.
   Judging from my wife you'd think it was
tomorrow.
   All sorts of summer like clothes have
been carefully placed on the bed in our
spare room. It's their final stop before
being packed away into our luggage.
   I should add that a half dozen people
have already inquired as to whether we
needed someone to carry our baggage for
the journey!
    My wife suggested that something was
missing with regard to my wardrobe. She
said I needed more casual shorts.
    It should be noted at this point that I
don't wear causal shorts very often. There
are a couple of reasons behind that
decision.
   First, I'm prone to skin cancer so I
usually stay covered up as much as is
comfortably practical.
   Secondly, alas, my James Bond like
legs look a bit more like Ernest Borgnine
limbs these days.
    The main reason, however, is that I
don't like going out to buy them! You
know, having to try on 15 different
pair (unless you're shopping without
your wife) in one of those little closets
the Big Box stores laughingly call
"Fitting Rooms."
     Hoping to avoid the situation I
carefully steered my wife away from the
Men's Department during our last big
shopping trip and reminded her that I
had two pair stored away, somewhere
safe.
     I was able to locate both during a
search earlier this week. But it wasn't
enough.
     During a shopping trip of her own
my wife found a pair which she assures
me will be perfect after a bit of ironing.
     They do fit, although I complained
they didn't look quite right to me.
      Later today she has insisted that I
try them on again...without my suit
coat and tie!
      Hope that will avoid any more
shopping...and that all your NEWS
is good!