Out At The Ranch!

    FRIDAY, JULY 24TH.

  OUT AT THE RANCH!

     Well as most of you know yesterday,
July 23rd, was National Hot Dog Day!
In honor of the occasion my wife and
I headed out to the Ranch! The Ranch
Wagon that is, in Shavertown.
    It's one of those old classic road
side restaurants that happens to feature
hot dogs and the like. As a matter of
fact the place started in 1955 as a Hot
Dog Stand.
    They still have "Car Hops" there.
For those of you under 50-years-old
a Car Hop is a waiter or waitress that
takes your order from and delivers
your food to....your car.
    We opted to use the Ranch Wagon's
gazebo-like pavilion where the tables
are shaded from the sun.
    I had one initial complaint as my menu
seemed to be blank. My wife flipped it
over and a whole range of tasty choices
suddenly came into view.
     It was truly like the good old days.
My wife even had a milkshake to go
with her hot dog in honor of the day.
     Being a rebel (even without the
flag) I went with another American
classic, a hamburger and fries!
      We know a lot of good restaurants
around and out of the area. But
sometimes you just can't beat a road
side stand the features some of the
basics like hotdogs and milk shakes!
       Hope you celebrated National
Hot Dog day on your travels and
that all your NEWS is good!

A Day At The Office

     THURSDAY, JULY 23RD

      My wife and I took advantage
of Wednesday's beautiful weather
and headed out for a picnic.
      After a quick stop at Dunkin
Donut and Subway for sandwiches
to suit our individual tastes we
drove to one of our favorite picnic
places. The Twin Covered Bridges
at Forks, near Bloomsburg.
    Built in the 1800's, and repaired
after several major floods, the
two bridges, not really "twins" by
the way, take visitors back to an
earlier time when life was slower
and more relaxed.
   We found one gentleman already
using one of the picnic benches set
up on the bridges. But he wasn't
eating lunch!
    Using a cellphone and a laptop
computer he was "taking care of
business." I don't have the
slightest idea what his business is.
But if more people were "working"
at a site like this I suspect they'd
never need blood pressure
medication!
    We didn't get too close for fear
we'd break the mood! I don't know
what he does for an office in the
winter. But I wouldn't be surprised
to find him on a quiet beach
somewhere!
     And if he ever decides to quit
I could be lured back to the work
force!
     Hope he takes a break for
lunch....and that all your NEWS
is good!

Build A Better Mouse Trap......

       WEDNESDAY, JULY 22ND

 BUILD A BETTER MOUSE TRAP.....

     You've all heard the old saying.
"Build a better mousetrap and the world
will beat a path to your door." It has been
attributed to Ralph Waldo Emerson in
the late nineteenth century. And a lot of
people have apparently taken old Ralph's
advice!
     We detected signs that a mouse had
been visiting us recently. So I set out to
get the most modern mouse trap I could
find.
    The selection was most impressive!
These days you can even buy an electronic
unit that, according to the advertisement,
keeps mice away! And speaking of
"keeping mice," there was a large
selection of huge sticky pads that are
suppose to trap mice where they step
on them.
     But here's the thing. I don't want to
capture mice! I have no interest or intent
on training a new "Mr. Jingles" for
"Mouseville." I'm more interested in
Capital punishment! How quick we
forget to brought us The Plague! So
my arsenal includes several traps
designed long before anyone improved
on the idea!
    Hope we don't use up too much of
our good cheese on these things...and
that all your NEWS is good!
    (UPDATE....This one won't plague
us anymore!!!!!!)







     
    

Little Stinkers!

       TUESDAY, JULY 21ST

        LITTLE STINKERS

    I think I've mentioned this
before. But, except for the three
fish who call my wife's aquarium
home, we don't have any pets.
    Generally the neighbors
provide them for us.
     A few have dogs, But most of
the time you never even know
they're there.
     Then there are the cats! I
stopped counting a long time ago.
Although we have spotted the
newest litter of four that, like the
rest of them, have decided to use
our back and front yard as their
restroom as they travel around
the development.
     They are feral cats that only
hang around because someone,
who doesn't claim ownership,
throws some food out every
day.
      And now it appears the
food is attracting still more
critters to the neighborhood. The
latest is a group of baby skunks
we've seen over the past couple
weeks. Of course we knew they
were there well before we saw
them! I'm guessing the cats and
the polecats came across each
other and the new guys left their
usual calling card!
      I'm sure both breeds would
be happy to have a good home.
So, if you're looking for pets we
have an excess around here!
      (You can have one neighbor
 too!)
      Hope they'll find their way
anywhere else....and that all your
NEWS is good!

You'll Swing For This!

      MONDAY, JULY 20TH

    YOU'LL SWING FOR THIS!

      Although he's never been convicted,
my son spent the past two days at hard
labor!
      It was suppose to take an estimated
six hours to assemble a wooden swing
and slide set his daughter could enjoy
in the back yard. I don't think a crew
of 6 could have accomplished the job
in 6 hours!
     Whether he realizes it or not, I was
a big help! I stayed completely away
from the construction site! This
decision was based on personal
experience.
     Many years ago I set out to put
together a metal swing set for my own
children. My son included. Eventually
my kids were able to enjoy the equipment.
But my wife was forced to keep them
far away as I took on the "do it yourself"
project. It was the first time my wife
realized I knew any cuss words!
     I pulled them out of some deep,
dark recess of my mind after seeing
that parts that were suppose to fit
together didn't and that my skin was
nowhere near as tough as the hammer
and screw drivers that frequently cut
into me! The rack could not have
offered more torture!
      The instruction sheets looked like
Egyptian hieroglyphics and few of the
parts resembled anything on those
pages! I'm not sure my finished
product did either.
      Somewhere around the house I
still have a box filled with the "extra
parts" I had left over from the job!
I don't "build" or attempt to build
things anymore. That's why God
made construction companies, and
sons!
      Hope my grand daughter "gets
the swing of things"...and that all
your NEWS is good!
(Photos courtesy of my daughter-
in-law Charlotte!)

It's Sundae!

          SUNDAY, JULY 19TH.

             IT'S SUNDAE!

    What a great day! It's the 3rd Sunday
of July....and that means it's National Ice
Cream Day (Hence my title, It's Sundae)!
    In 1984 President Reagan proclaimed
July as National Ice Cream Month. He
also established the third Sunday of July
as National Ice Cream Day. So, you see,
it is official!
     Coincidentally,it is also "National
Raspberry Cake Day! I suppose you
could combine the two with a scoop or
two of ice cream on your Raspberry
cake!
     Everybody in my family likes ice
cream although my son usually won't
eat any. Something about "carbs" I think.
    When he and my daughters were little
I used to get them as big a cone of ice
cream as I could. Then, when they
couldn't finish it. I was there to step in
and help out.
     Over the years ice cream helped make
me the man I am today. Something about
carbs I think!
     There are probably a few people who
don't like ice cream. I just never met any
of them. And I'm not too sure I'd trust
them!
      So enjoy your day! Have a Sundae
or a triple decker cone. Or a nice milk
shake or the like.
       Hope nobody gives you the
raspberries..and that all your
your NEWS is good!

Putt, Putt!

     SATURDAY, JULY 18TH

             PUTT, PUTT!

     I gave up golf many years ago.
My slice was so severe I only saw
the others in my foursome at the
tee and on the green. They walked
the fairway together while I hiked
the edge of the course, usually in
the thick brush searching for my
golf ball.
      But then miniature golf came
along. No long walks or lost golf
balls. All you had to do was putt
the ball through an obstacle like
a turning windmill and into the
hole. Well that's the way it used
to be.
     Somewhere the diabolical
people who design miniature golf
courses are doing away with the
windmills and setting up courses
that will drive you mad!
     I joined some family members
on one such course yesterday. It
was designed around a castle. But
a knight would have a tough time
holding his temper after attacking
the dragon and other obstacles set
up to challenge players.
     One hole was clearly out in
the open just about 30 feet away.
But that hole was set up at the top of
what looked like an ant hole. Unless
you struck the ball at exactly the
right speed and trajectory, and
enjoyed a bit of luck, you could
count on taking the 5-stroke limit!
     The easier the holes looked the
more deceiving they were and
the more laughs the designers
were having at my expense!
      I came away feeling as if I
had done 18 holes at Pebble
Beach with just a putter! And this
was Mini Golf! I did strike the ball
a few fewer times than the rest of
my party....so...I did win! And,
actually, we all win when we're
out together!
    Still, I hope they bring back
the windmills...and that all your
NEWS is good!